I remember my night, just before my job interview while I was in university. My friends said, Hemant, try to read something, search on internet for what kind of questions they ask. I said, ‘I don’t need to know anything. If they are going to ask anything about me, then I am the one who knows best about me. If they are going to ask anything about my work, then I am the one who knows it best because I am doing that project. So, one should be studying are those who are going to interview me and not me’. I may sounded very arrogant, too confident (over confident), whatever, but I liked myself for what I thought. I got that job, and I am doing still that job it’s different story altogether, but it’s not the thing I want to talk about today. It’s something very inner core of myself.
Always, when in doubt I had three things in my mind;
1. I know this about myself and I already proved it to myself
2. I know this about myself and I need to prove it to myself
3. I don’t know this about myself and I need if my understanding about myself is correct or not
Fortunately, unfortunately I was always stuck in first two regime. Fortunately because it made me very confident guy, unfortunately because in other case just to prove myself, I had to go through extreme and very long lasting pain. To give an example, I knew how the world around me will react if I fail in exam (especially engineering). I deliberately failed in final exams which cost me an year. I could see the world around me changing (as expected) and it took them almost 6-8 years to starting thinking good about me. Till then, I was bad ass, wasted guy, person with no future etc etc. I didn’t bother much about it, because I created that situation around me to check who will act the way I thought will act. And who will be there to say me ‘Hemant, if you are doing something I am sure there is a reason behind it’. There were only two people who said so. They were my Father, and my Mother. Don’t I have a reason to be luckiest person to be on the planet.
Another example; I never used to smoke, but now I am smoker and don’t feel like quitting. I started saying, let me see what happens if I smoke. Probably I will die way sooner than what my parents expect me to live in this world (no one truly wish I that I should live longer except my family), but still I will be happy to live it the way I wanted it. And if I ever be sad, I will sad because I wanted to do few things for me, and I never got chance to do that. But happyness of doing the things for others who deserve it much more than anything else.
That’s the proverb we have which says, ‘learn from others mistakes so that you will not make the same’. Probably I chose the other path to learn many things by myself. Very hard, painful, waste of time sometimes but atleast leaves no doubt in mind.
Today again, I am in midst of this process, to check if I am who I really think about myself. Certainly it is not that the place you want to be, but certainly I know that future after this is going to be so good. It’s painful again, but still so good. Because then tomorrow, I can say, ‘it’s someone else who needs to prepare to know me, and not me. I know everyting about myself’. Again, I am arrogant today, I am over confident today. Maybe I the fool today, but atleast I will not be the fool tomorrow.
I am in love with this line. Life is beautiful but not as much as mind.
Friday, September 16, 2011
Monday, September 12, 2011
Poetry Revisited !
Yesteday I watched latest Bollywood movie “Zindagi Mile Na Dobara” and suddenly felt like writing a poem. So here it goes, what came in my mind.
ना जाने क्योँ आज बारिश रिमझिम सी हो रही है
ना जाने क्योँ आज लोग नए से लग रहे है|
सपने तो हमेशा देखे थे मैंने
ना जाने क्योँ वही सपने आज नए से लग रहे है |
देखता था खुद को आईने मे रोज़
ना जाने क्योँ आज उसी चेहरे पे रौनक सी छाई है|
इस दुनिया मे तो पहले भी था लेकिन
ना जाने क्योँ आज यह दुनिया नयी सी लग रही है ||
I don't know if I can translate this my own poem in English, but I will try soon.
ना जाने क्योँ आज बारिश रिमझिम सी हो रही है
ना जाने क्योँ आज लोग नए से लग रहे है|
सपने तो हमेशा देखे थे मैंने
ना जाने क्योँ वही सपने आज नए से लग रहे है |
देखता था खुद को आईने मे रोज़
ना जाने क्योँ आज उसी चेहरे पे रौनक सी छाई है|
इस दुनिया मे तो पहले भी था लेकिन
ना जाने क्योँ आज यह दुनिया नयी सी लग रही है ||
I don't know if I can translate this my own poem in English, but I will try soon.
Friday, August 19, 2011
Decoding Indians!!!
On the eve of our Independence’s day I promised to write something about my country. Especially when all the time I talk lot of crap about my country! Time couldn’t be perfect since I was watching one of my favorite advertisements about cell phone service provider. Back in good old days, it touched my heart and made me dream. It made me dream to buy a cell phone one day. Today, I was watching the same advertisement again, and realize what makes us Indians Indian. If I think, taking this advertisement in consideration, I can surely say its’ ‘emotions’. After watching the advertisement today, I could feel in the same way, what I felt 10 years back. So here it goes, irrespective of everything, why I feel proud to be born in India and what I have got.
People say we are emotional fools (especially western world), which might be true. Everyone needs something different in their life, but probably we need something which gives reason for our own existence. May be we are one of the rarest species who gets the most important thing needed for human being, the thing called as “Love” and that too without asking for it, from everyone.
India was a country of king and kingdoms, and still today, it is country of kind of “king & kingdoms”. I am king in my own because of all the love I get from my family, from my relatives, from my friends, which makes you feel you are the king of the world. And it doesn’t depends on how much money you have in your wallet, doesn’t depend on if you are extremely good looking or you suck by matter of physical beauty, or if you are CEO or if you are a taxi driver. We all may be earning different money, but we do all earn equal amount of love (it’s a phrase because love cannot be counted). And there is no doubt about it.
We always believe that we live our life for not ourselves but for others. We depend on each other hence “I” will be rarely in our conversation but what we say is “We”. Parents live their life for their kids; kids live their life for their parents, for their friends, and when grow up the same kids live their life for their love, their wife, their kids and circle continues. We are born with the feeling that life is best lived with the people you love and matters, and so as everyone around us. For us what matter is what you get, you have to give it back in this same life. For us, we don’t need retirement benefits, because our retirement is happiness of our kids. Benefits can give you money, but cannot give you love when need most. We believe it’s our job, it’s our duty, it’s our love, and it’s our dharma to give hand to our old parents when they taught us how to take step on this planet. For most of us, life is not profit and lost, but a laugh to be shared with your loved once. We believe we earn people only once and we have to be with them forever.
We may not be polite, we may not say ‘good morning’ to every passing stranger or ‘thank you’ for everything, but at the same time we do not hesitate to give up everything for loved one around us.
I feel very lucky, and probably rest all in India as lucky as me. Reason, I got amazing parents who loves me unconditionally. They loves me from bottom of their heart, scarified their entire life because they though they brought me in this world and now it’s their job to give me best possible thing in world. It doesn’t matter if they don’t have a rupee to spend of them because of me. I got amazing sisters, cousins, relatives, for whom my happiness was more important than anything else. I got amazing friends (probably the guy with most number of best friends in the world). Even they are pissed off for whatsoever reason, but always their shoulder is always there for me. Whatever happens, I know there are and always will be people beside me, and saying “don’t you worry, I am with you”
If you are meeting an Indian, you are meeting an emotional fool. A person for whom life is matter of relations and love we share with each other. And that’s why even to a stranger we greet with ‘relation’ opposed to Mr., Miss, and Sir Etc.
I feel proud and lucky to be born here; the place which makes you thinks not only about you but people around you. It’s India. If I get a million chances, I will still want to be kid of my same parents, still want to be in the same village, and still want to be the guy who I am, and the same people around me.
Having said so, yes, we have lot more to learn from rest of the world. We need to learn. But there is so much NOT to lose. I really hope that one day we will achieve that balance. Keeping what we have and learning from others. And I know, that day, I will say, yes, we are the number 1.
Did I sound very much like typical Indian Yes, because I am.
Happy Independence Day!
People say we are emotional fools (especially western world), which might be true. Everyone needs something different in their life, but probably we need something which gives reason for our own existence. May be we are one of the rarest species who gets the most important thing needed for human being, the thing called as “Love” and that too without asking for it, from everyone.
India was a country of king and kingdoms, and still today, it is country of kind of “king & kingdoms”. I am king in my own because of all the love I get from my family, from my relatives, from my friends, which makes you feel you are the king of the world. And it doesn’t depends on how much money you have in your wallet, doesn’t depend on if you are extremely good looking or you suck by matter of physical beauty, or if you are CEO or if you are a taxi driver. We all may be earning different money, but we do all earn equal amount of love (it’s a phrase because love cannot be counted). And there is no doubt about it.
We always believe that we live our life for not ourselves but for others. We depend on each other hence “I” will be rarely in our conversation but what we say is “We”. Parents live their life for their kids; kids live their life for their parents, for their friends, and when grow up the same kids live their life for their love, their wife, their kids and circle continues. We are born with the feeling that life is best lived with the people you love and matters, and so as everyone around us. For us what matter is what you get, you have to give it back in this same life. For us, we don’t need retirement benefits, because our retirement is happiness of our kids. Benefits can give you money, but cannot give you love when need most. We believe it’s our job, it’s our duty, it’s our love, and it’s our dharma to give hand to our old parents when they taught us how to take step on this planet. For most of us, life is not profit and lost, but a laugh to be shared with your loved once. We believe we earn people only once and we have to be with them forever.
We may not be polite, we may not say ‘good morning’ to every passing stranger or ‘thank you’ for everything, but at the same time we do not hesitate to give up everything for loved one around us.
I feel very lucky, and probably rest all in India as lucky as me. Reason, I got amazing parents who loves me unconditionally. They loves me from bottom of their heart, scarified their entire life because they though they brought me in this world and now it’s their job to give me best possible thing in world. It doesn’t matter if they don’t have a rupee to spend of them because of me. I got amazing sisters, cousins, relatives, for whom my happiness was more important than anything else. I got amazing friends (probably the guy with most number of best friends in the world). Even they are pissed off for whatsoever reason, but always their shoulder is always there for me. Whatever happens, I know there are and always will be people beside me, and saying “don’t you worry, I am with you”
If you are meeting an Indian, you are meeting an emotional fool. A person for whom life is matter of relations and love we share with each other. And that’s why even to a stranger we greet with ‘relation’ opposed to Mr., Miss, and Sir Etc.
I feel proud and lucky to be born here; the place which makes you thinks not only about you but people around you. It’s India. If I get a million chances, I will still want to be kid of my same parents, still want to be in the same village, and still want to be the guy who I am, and the same people around me.
Having said so, yes, we have lot more to learn from rest of the world. We need to learn. But there is so much NOT to lose. I really hope that one day we will achieve that balance. Keeping what we have and learning from others. And I know, that day, I will say, yes, we are the number 1.
Did I sound very much like typical Indian Yes, because I am.
Happy Independence Day!
Tuesday, July 26, 2011
Executive summary: Visit to Yuzhno, Sakhalin – Town on Island on far east Russia
World is amazing place, with variety of natural wonders, islands, and what not. This year, it was my third trip to Sakhalin, spending my most of time in the city Yuzhno. I can say I have enough experience of this city to write a bit about it now ;). So here it goes, executive summary of the town.
1. All the girls less than 30 years old are amazingly beautiful. Hottest chicas you will ever see in your life
2. At the same time somehow, most of the girls who are more than 30 years old, somehow lose their shape. I don’t know the reason man!
3. Whatever the case, they dress amazingly well. If you think Milan, Paris is capital of fashion, then you are a fool. Come and visit Yuzno. Entire city is stage where models do catwalk.
4. But at the same time, all Russian men dress up like they are going to bed or too tired on looking into mirror. Benefits, if you are a traveler with moderate sense of fashion, your chances are gooood to get laid.
5. Every other foreigner in the city is somehow linked to oil and gas industry. Anyway there is nothing else in the city apart from beautiful mountains, great parks, nice beer, good food, nice people. But who cares.
6. Every other foreigner in the city looks like a bad ass. Huge in size, tattoos, gold chain, gold tooth, and trying to get laid with the hot Russian girls. That’s the favorite pastime of visitors here, every evening.
7. Talking about hot Russian girls (btw, there is nothing to talk about this town except hot Russian girls), good thing is they never go the bar alone. They always have their 2-3 hot Russian chica friends with them. Grab one, get 3 free
8. Well this island gets summer for ~3 months and for 9 months its winter. Temperature can go upto -20 deg c. Favorite activity in the summer, can anyone guess. Yes, you are right, go to the park, sunbathe, preferably naked, go to the beach for swim, preferably naked. I think old men become healthier during this time of the year, since they took loads of efforts to climb mountain, go to the park, go to the beach to watch hot Russian girls naked
9. So if you are married and if you want to screw your marriage, this your place. Amazingly divorce rate is 88% so not to worry about getting stuck with one Russian wife but you may get plenty.
10. Winter is more amazing. Skiiiiiiiiiiing. I think everyone in the town is crazy about skiing. This place got really great hills to practice your ice-walking activities. I heard Russian Olympic team use to visit this town for practicing.
11. What, you don’t like skiing. What an ass! Anyway, for you then there is a good activity. Go to sauna, and get surrounded by hot Russian chicas. Yeah, I know you dreamed about this entire your life right.
12. So if you can survive the beauty of the island then you should watch the traffic here. This place got the most amazing traffic rules you will ever see. If you ever visit here, watch the traffic light system and you will be amazed. Don’t worry, people respect pedestrian here so they won’t kill you, except killing each other with their vehicle.
This is the summary. If you want full visit report and willing to visit this place, then please ask me personally. I will give you best advise possible :D
I hope rest is well.
1. All the girls less than 30 years old are amazingly beautiful. Hottest chicas you will ever see in your life
2. At the same time somehow, most of the girls who are more than 30 years old, somehow lose their shape. I don’t know the reason man!
3. Whatever the case, they dress amazingly well. If you think Milan, Paris is capital of fashion, then you are a fool. Come and visit Yuzno. Entire city is stage where models do catwalk.
4. But at the same time, all Russian men dress up like they are going to bed or too tired on looking into mirror. Benefits, if you are a traveler with moderate sense of fashion, your chances are gooood to get laid.
5. Every other foreigner in the city is somehow linked to oil and gas industry. Anyway there is nothing else in the city apart from beautiful mountains, great parks, nice beer, good food, nice people. But who cares.
6. Every other foreigner in the city looks like a bad ass. Huge in size, tattoos, gold chain, gold tooth, and trying to get laid with the hot Russian girls. That’s the favorite pastime of visitors here, every evening.
7. Talking about hot Russian girls (btw, there is nothing to talk about this town except hot Russian girls), good thing is they never go the bar alone. They always have their 2-3 hot Russian chica friends with them. Grab one, get 3 free
8. Well this island gets summer for ~3 months and for 9 months its winter. Temperature can go upto -20 deg c. Favorite activity in the summer, can anyone guess. Yes, you are right, go to the park, sunbathe, preferably naked, go to the beach for swim, preferably naked. I think old men become healthier during this time of the year, since they took loads of efforts to climb mountain, go to the park, go to the beach to watch hot Russian girls naked
9. So if you are married and if you want to screw your marriage, this your place. Amazingly divorce rate is 88% so not to worry about getting stuck with one Russian wife but you may get plenty.
10. Winter is more amazing. Skiiiiiiiiiiing. I think everyone in the town is crazy about skiing. This place got really great hills to practice your ice-walking activities. I heard Russian Olympic team use to visit this town for practicing.
11. What, you don’t like skiing. What an ass! Anyway, for you then there is a good activity. Go to sauna, and get surrounded by hot Russian chicas. Yeah, I know you dreamed about this entire your life right.
12. So if you can survive the beauty of the island then you should watch the traffic here. This place got the most amazing traffic rules you will ever see. If you ever visit here, watch the traffic light system and you will be amazed. Don’t worry, people respect pedestrian here so they won’t kill you, except killing each other with their vehicle.
This is the summary. If you want full visit report and willing to visit this place, then please ask me personally. I will give you best advise possible :D
I hope rest is well.
Saturday, May 7, 2011
The rising sun will ultimately slowly set...
Being on the road all of my life, the best education I had is from life. This life showed me various aspects of it and I tried to learn as much as possible. One of the things I always admire is music, especially Qawwali. It is one form of music, usually played live of independent artist, talking about life. My childhood is marked by listening to numerous qawwalies and trying to understand its meaning and learn out of it. One of such qawwali is ‘Chadhta Suraj Dhalta hai, dhal jayega’ (literal meaning, rising sun will slowly set and disappear in the end).
For those who haven’t heard about it, here is English translation of it. I tried to live as much as possible according to the things have said.
Chadhta Suraj dhalta hai dhal jayega (Rising sun will slowly set and disappear in the end)
In this world, there are many once famous people who disappeared from the world without ever noticed by anyone. This world, this life has made disappear many like them. The one who is proud of his/her young age will regret tomorrow. Those proud young people, listen carefully, the rising sun will slowly set down.
You are a traveler in this world, and this world is illusion. Your life is very short and money, ego, house, jewelry, you will take nothing along with you. You know that you came empty handed in this world and you will go empty handed. So don’t be ignorant, and don’t have ego about that. You are so lost in this materialism of the world that you forgot yourself and God and drifting yourself in this world. You have seen all the time that the one who lose something is the one who gain something. The one who tried to understand the real meaning of life always cries over fading Sun and wasted opportunities. You know that life is ultimately going to end so why you are so attached to it? Everyone is worried about their problems but no one can understand true meaning of life. If you want to know about it then seize today’s opportunity. If you keep sleeping then the opportunity will vanish.
Death has taught lessons to even the great ones. Alexander the great came with lot of ambition, but in the end, he left alone. Those who are very proud of their achievements and wealth at the end find nothing is left behind no one lights a candle for them. Whether you are rich or poor, your ultimate destination is the grave.
Remember, what you do to other, other will do to you. As you sow you reap, if you walk arrogantly one day you will fall down.
Everyone is going to die and you are not going to be exception. As soon as you die all relations you have with your father, mother, sister, wife, kids will end and you will have more surprise. As soon as you are dead they will all fight over your wealth, the only thing they will give is place for your grave.
Those whom you believe are truly yours, you never know what they can do. One day they will throw flowers in your marriage procession and the same people for their greed kill you and throw soil on your grave. All your achievements will be forgotten and your near and dear ones will ultimately forget you.
That is why my advice to you is Think hard don’t waste your life, seize opportunities and go with the flow. Remember, you came in this world with your fist closed but while going you will go with hands spread. You will not gain anything by running after materialist thing.
Don’t be so proud young man. Rising Sun will ultimately set down.
For those who haven’t heard about it, here is English translation of it. I tried to live as much as possible according to the things have said.
Chadhta Suraj dhalta hai dhal jayega (Rising sun will slowly set and disappear in the end)
In this world, there are many once famous people who disappeared from the world without ever noticed by anyone. This world, this life has made disappear many like them. The one who is proud of his/her young age will regret tomorrow. Those proud young people, listen carefully, the rising sun will slowly set down.
You are a traveler in this world, and this world is illusion. Your life is very short and money, ego, house, jewelry, you will take nothing along with you. You know that you came empty handed in this world and you will go empty handed. So don’t be ignorant, and don’t have ego about that. You are so lost in this materialism of the world that you forgot yourself and God and drifting yourself in this world. You have seen all the time that the one who lose something is the one who gain something. The one who tried to understand the real meaning of life always cries over fading Sun and wasted opportunities. You know that life is ultimately going to end so why you are so attached to it? Everyone is worried about their problems but no one can understand true meaning of life. If you want to know about it then seize today’s opportunity. If you keep sleeping then the opportunity will vanish.
Death has taught lessons to even the great ones. Alexander the great came with lot of ambition, but in the end, he left alone. Those who are very proud of their achievements and wealth at the end find nothing is left behind no one lights a candle for them. Whether you are rich or poor, your ultimate destination is the grave.
Remember, what you do to other, other will do to you. As you sow you reap, if you walk arrogantly one day you will fall down.
Everyone is going to die and you are not going to be exception. As soon as you die all relations you have with your father, mother, sister, wife, kids will end and you will have more surprise. As soon as you are dead they will all fight over your wealth, the only thing they will give is place for your grave.
Those whom you believe are truly yours, you never know what they can do. One day they will throw flowers in your marriage procession and the same people for their greed kill you and throw soil on your grave. All your achievements will be forgotten and your near and dear ones will ultimately forget you.
That is why my advice to you is Think hard don’t waste your life, seize opportunities and go with the flow. Remember, you came in this world with your fist closed but while going you will go with hands spread. You will not gain anything by running after materialist thing.
Don’t be so proud young man. Rising Sun will ultimately set down.
Wednesday, May 4, 2011
Life is a bitch so you better be an asshole
I always say that life is beautiful but as much as mind. There is a reason. Reason is life itself is not beautiful. It is a bitch and you need to be an asshole to overcome it, to get overcome it, to rule it. If you are one of those womanizer who like to go to bar and get a girl home for a night you can connect it.
If you meet a girl in a bar, who is a bitch, then try as much as hard, be as much nice as you want, you will not get that girl. You need to be an asshole to get that girl. There is a saying that all the girls runs behind asshole. The same goes with life. If you are a nice guy in your life, especially with your life, it will never treat you well. You need to be an asshole to rule your life before your life rules over you.
Once upon a time I gave all my attention to my life, but nothing happened in turn. And it started changing when I started giving a fuck about life. And it’s true. It’s a law of nature. Law of the universe. Even in Mahabharata is it written, “Bin mange moti mile, mange mile na bhick” (you will get pearls without asking and you will not get a charity if you ask). Don’t ask anything to life. Be a asshole, real one, be harsh to your life, what it coming to your way if you think it is not the one you want, be angry, just to make sure that your life behaves the way you want.
I have been an asshole to all of my life. I changed a bit without knowing it and it started becoming bitch. It’s time again to be an asshole.
Let the game begin again!
If you meet a girl in a bar, who is a bitch, then try as much as hard, be as much nice as you want, you will not get that girl. You need to be an asshole to get that girl. There is a saying that all the girls runs behind asshole. The same goes with life. If you are a nice guy in your life, especially with your life, it will never treat you well. You need to be an asshole to rule your life before your life rules over you.
Once upon a time I gave all my attention to my life, but nothing happened in turn. And it started changing when I started giving a fuck about life. And it’s true. It’s a law of nature. Law of the universe. Even in Mahabharata is it written, “Bin mange moti mile, mange mile na bhick” (you will get pearls without asking and you will not get a charity if you ask). Don’t ask anything to life. Be a asshole, real one, be harsh to your life, what it coming to your way if you think it is not the one you want, be angry, just to make sure that your life behaves the way you want.
I have been an asshole to all of my life. I changed a bit without knowing it and it started becoming bitch. It’s time again to be an asshole.
Let the game begin again!
Tuesday, April 19, 2011
Heart vs Knwoledge
I remember, when I was kid and used to get in fight with my friends, a simple ‘sorry’ will resolve everything. Sometimes even there wasn’t necessity of sorry. Anger use to wash away with the next day shower and you are as happy to be back life before. Now we have grown up, this doesn’t work. Why? We called child’s heart as innocent one, so what makes we grown up as? Egoistic? May be. Whatever it may be but it is not good. Question remains, innocence of kid’s heart versus knowledge of grownups. Which is better it a million dollar question. If you ask this question to grownup then you will get various reasoning, answers. If you ask this question to kid, they will get confused because there is no such thing for them. Because for them questions are very simple as the answer.
Question? Why we lose our own innocence which was there, within us, within everyone? May be we think we are more smart, maybe we think we know more about the world that a kid, maybe we want to ignore it since grown up heart is more fragile than kid’s. I don’t know, but certainly I know that I am missing kid’s heart. Very much.
If you have got one then you are very fortunate, if you are looking for one then let me know once you get it.
Question? Why we lose our own innocence which was there, within us, within everyone? May be we think we are more smart, maybe we think we know more about the world that a kid, maybe we want to ignore it since grown up heart is more fragile than kid’s. I don’t know, but certainly I know that I am missing kid’s heart. Very much.
If you have got one then you are very fortunate, if you are looking for one then let me know once you get it.
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